Money Masters?

I've been watching this documentary online for at least a week and a half now. These are the reasons it is taking me so long:

•It's about 3 and a half hours
•Its circa-1997 production values are...curious. There is only one host/narrator, who apparently traveled most of the Western world to stand in front of buildings and monuments to talk about them, all while holding and gesturing with what may or may not be the same pen/pencil/twig.
•The only other person in the video is the guy who does the voiceovers for the quotes, and he does them all in the same voice. Franklin, Jefferson, Lincoln, evil Bankers; they all have exactly the same booming, over-dramatic, "I'm doing this in one take, awkward pauses be damned" voice. I'm really hoping that in the hour or so I have left, there'll be a woman quoted, and I really hope he uses the same voice.
•Speaking of awkward pauses, there are so many in this movie that I wonder whether it's some sort of brainwashing technique. Or maybe it is specifically designed to give the viewer enough time, with no noise or significant movement of video, to fall asleep...because that's exactly what happens to me.
•All this is in addition to the video being so pixelated and blurry that I feel like I'm squinting through a dirty window to watch it on a TV with bad reception.

That said, there's some nearly life-changing information in it, and sometimes the somewhat nerdy host gets really indignant about what he's talking about, which is amusing and strangely infectious.

I was going to link to it, but it's called Money Masters, so you can just type that on in to Google, that's what I did. Also, hulu.com has free full epsiodes of some good TV shows, old and new. I only wish I was paid the .008 cents I'm due for advertising it.

Two phrases

First, "chain smoking." After a lot of thinking, I still wish this had some significance aside from the fact that it means smoking a lot. I want an actual chain to be involved. At least metaphorically. Even the most literal interpretation of the current phrase involves just lighting a second cigarette with the first, which is so far removed from any concept of a chain that it's just silly. And come to think of it, chain letters are really more like trees or tournament brackets than chains.

"Can't have your cake and eat it too."
Yes you can! What you can't do is eat your cake and have it too.* That's what it should be. And even though this is supposed to mean "the things people want are often incompatible," I am 100% sure that nobody has ever wanted to eat a cake but still have it around afterward. In fact, it's very common for people to eat cake (or force others to) so it won't be around. And if you do want it around, it's only because you want to eat some more of it later, which still leaves these as compatible wants.
If you, for some reason, want to possess cake as much or more than you want to eat it, then you are a non-representative weirdo outcast (who shouldn't be ashamed of being so, but who should also not be the subject of a proverb meant to apply to the general public).

In conclusion, "chain mail" is currently the only compound noun or verb beginning with chain that I support, and we should choose either "You can't eat your cake and have it too, even though you wouldn't ever want to" or "Cake is not unlimited."

Please join me in rallying around these important causes.

*Bartleby agrees!

THEM!

There is a half-hearted trail of ants making its way from my bathroom doorjamb to the wall underneath my window. Since I have nothing for them to drag home, they see fit to just pass through.

Initially I was against the whole arrangement, but these ants, while slower than the California variety to which I'm accustomed, have a much tougher exoskeleton, making them so much harder to squish that it's not worth the time and toilet paper.

Surprisingly, I haven't found any crawling on me yet - they stick pretty much to their route. Although occasionally when I move my shoes, there'll be a few that scatter (slowly) and I almost feel bad, like I'm the uncool parent breaking up a party. But then I realize that ants shouldn't be hiding under shoes anyway, they should be out somewhere being industrious and snubbing carefree grasshoppers.

So Beck has these two albums, right? Guero and Guerolito.

Guerolito is all the songs on Guero, but remixed. I only know one of them, so whenever any of the others plays when I'm listening to my music in random order, I try to guess whether it's the original Beck song or the remix. I am wrong every single time, without fail.

Dude has some weird songs.

Whatcha doin Tuenight?

When I observe my week according the 7-day standard, I realize I can't remember the last day off I had, nor do I know when my next will be. I accept this as a consequence of having three jobs, since it means I'll have paid off my debt that much sooner, but the idea can still get me down occasionally.

So I've decided (just now, as I type this) to subdivide my week into 14 half-days.
Now I get several days off a week! Sure, I may be working Monday, but not Monnight! And I think I have Wednesnight off too - that's a whole weekend right there!